some scattered and angry thoughts on the PA gym shooting

[kenjari]

In case you hadn't heard, George Sodini shot up a women's fitness class at a Pennsylvania gym; and three women are dead and ten more injured. Because he was frustrated and bitter over his inability to find a girlfriend/get laid. Obviously, he was a very disturbed man, and there are tons of romantically unlucky men (and women) who don't take it out on random members of their gender of choice. Nonetheless, ther are some important issues that this crime brings up.
While Sodini's actions were extreme, the misogynistic sentiments he expressed in his writings truly aren't that extreme. The view of women not as humans and individuals but as a monolithic group of things to be gained is nothing new. The sense of entitlement to the attentions and sexual favors of attractive women is all too familiar. The resultant hostility when women didn't comply with his desires and expectations is also all too familiar. This kind of shit happens at a low level every damn day. When a man in a car at a stoplight yells "hey baby, nice ass" at a woman on the sidewalk, and if she doesn't smile or acknowledge him or act flattered, he quickly switches to calling her a ugly whore/nasty bitch/etc. When I wouldn't let a strange man at a college party walk me home and his response was to suggest that I was overly paranoid. But I'm willing to bet that there will be very little larger discussion of these things, that Sodini's words will be mostly dismissed as merely the rantings of a disturbed individual, and that there will be unsavory suggestions that if women had just been nicer to Sodini, none of this would have happened. Actually, it looks like I'd win a bet on that last point.
And let me address that last point a little. Because it's a disturbing one. Think about it - it's the idea that I, as a woman, should endeavor to be nice to and react favorably to any and all men who seek my attention, because otherwise they might hurt me. I find that terrifying.

Comments

[wildpaletz.livejournal.com]

I agree. Very disturbing. Not right. Is that attitude becoming rarer in younger men? I sure hope so.

[wildpaletz.livejournal.com]

PS can people get tried for hate crimes against women as women? Not possible here, but had he not killed himself successfully, would it count?

[kenjari.livejournal.com]

From my reading on this shooting, I'm pretty sure that current federal and PA legislation does not include gender in hate crime legislation. Maybe this will change that.

[apintrix.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that's awful.

Incidentally, all my emails to your address have been bouncing-- if you still want to get together tomorrow night, the plan is Mr. Crepe at 7 PM. Hope to see you there!

[kenjari.livejournal.com]

My e-mail is kenjari at gmail dot com.

[kenjari.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately, I'm not going to make it - I'm not feeling well (stomach trouble).

[hai-kah-uhk.livejournal.com]

I've been thinking a lot on this topic lately - how the woman is held responsible for both her actions and the actions of the men around her, and how society views this as right and normal. Parenthood may have something to do with it; I want to teach my son to see women as people instead of sex objects. Also, recently I've been dismayed to learn that, even at my age, I can still meet guys who see me not as a person but purely as a sex object. Over the internet, too! How does that even work? Even if I say on the internet that I'm female, all the guy sees are words on a screen. And yet he still sees fit to reduce me to an object of attraction.

I can accommodate and compromise with the best of society's pushover women, but I will not tolerate being judged - even favorably - by my appearance alone. Especially when the guy has never even f***ing seen me! WTF?! I sound pretty? Give me a break.

I used to pretend I was male. This murderous wacko illustrates perfectly why I would do such a thing. Sux.

[wavyarms.livejournal.com]

This is all so well put. I just want to quote all of it and point to it and say, "Exactly!" Thanks for writing it.

[kenjari.livejournal.com]

Aww, thanks. You're free to link to it, if you like.

[wavyarms.livejournal.com]

I may do that! (If I have enough energy today to deal with comments. :)